1. To use my energy to heal other people at detriment of myself.
I can’t tell you how much time I’ve wasted placing more hope in other’s than they have in themselves.
2. Allowing people, media or any system tell me what should make me happy
It’s taken me a long time to find myself because I allowed everything in the world define me. I don’t have the time anymore to sway what I know to be true about myself.
3. Remaining in toxic relationships/friendships believing with enough work it’ll magically change.
Relationships/friendships take effort, there’s no getting around it, but not the kind of work required to move mountains. I’m sorry, but I don’t have time for it, if I’m putting energy in to move mountains than obviously someone else isn’t carrying their weight. Relationships are also a two way street.
4. Allowing the media or people too define success for me.
When I told the world I wanted to be a freelance writer I got a lot of different responses. Some people supported me 100% and other’s seemed appalled that instead of working in the health industry I wanted to do something I love. Either way, I realized something valuable in this lesson, looking for approval to gain motivation is futile. Motivate yourself and know the life YOU are creating NO ONE else has or will have. Your happiness isn’t synonymous with what makes someone else happy.
5. Listening to negativity
It’s the simple fact that not every person is confident, not every person went through the same challenges as you or willing to hustle as hard. Look at Cardi B, she’s constantly referring to people who’ve tried to slow her grind down. Because when a a part of a Queen’s journey is her fallings, short comings and the haters that stayed loyal along the way. #YAS
6. Sexism, racism, and any hate in general
Come on people, isn’t it time we grow up and realize everyone will never look, behave and be exactly like you? And it’s impossible to live peacefully with hate. There’s people who really believe that if we get rid of all the black people and out spoken women we’ll live in a more peaceful time. No, hate is hate, and it does not speak the language of peace..silly.
7. Holding my tongue or choosing passivity
I don’t have time to pretend certain thing’s happening in the world are okay. I don’t have time to be passive about the growing cases of sexual abuse, violence, kidnapping, sexism and/or domestic abuse happening. Because I live here too and it bother’s me and I use freelance writing as platform to reach out to other men/women that are bother too. We are powerful in numbers.
8. Pretending I AM not powerful beyond my wildest dreams
A lot of people, especially women, dim their light. Whether it’s to not cause too much attention, too much adversity or to “keep the peace”. I’m over that, I realized that dimming my light and pretending I don’t have the power to ripple change harms my happiness. I want to remain honest with myself and look in the mirror knowing today I shined brighter than yesterday. So excuse me while I continue doing that.