My days have been nothing short of unconventional, I feel like I’m floating grappling to stay closely tied to the ground.
I seem to be doubting myself
Is any of this is real? or is my mind not strong enough to deal with the repercussions of my dark existence. Maybe I’m creating a fantasy world to live in and pretend I’m healing because the bagagge is far to heavy to keep carrying.
Then I question this doubt.
Is this pain the only meaning of my my existence? Are the cosmos truly a part of my genetic makeup? My entire life I’ve always had this inner voice, telling me there is so much more to life than waking up to remain asleep.
So here I am in this strange place, a place between knowing and unknowing. A place stuck between choosing my ego or a higher existence.
I have barely begun this journey and have so much to learn, but I can feel my light shifting somewhere inside me.
Music now sounds unadulterated, I am able to appreciate every instrument, strum and base.
Food tastes more vibrant.
Colors are crisper and cleaner.
My mind was an ocean of violent waves and storms centered around my victimized subconscious beliefs. Now the violent waters are starting to calm and the sky once black and full of the of lightening are beginning to heal with every new level of consciousness I reach.
The waters are bluer and breeding with new life.
I can’t explain the sensation but everything is going to be alright.
I have unlock my mind’s eye and she assures that underneath all these false illusions my ego believes that I’m a bomb ass bitch that is awaiting rebirth.