Toxic behavior is an addiction.
I just want to get that out of the way so as the article unfolds we are all aware that we’re dealing with something that doesn’t go away in one night.
There are no quick fixes for changes that matter the most in life. However, change is always necessary if you want to live a life that is authentic to you. I say this because you will find delving into your soul that there are so many patterns you take part in that don’t resonate with who you truly are. Sometimes you won’t even know where that habit came from because it’s always been in your life, here are five way’s to rid yourself of toxic behavior or at least make you aware of those behaviors in order to adjust them.
Which is talked about everywhere in every which way It looks like people are coming to the realization that the healthiest way to live is to simply live. Without mindfulness there is no self-awareness, without self-awareness, your subconscious runs the show and guess what your subconscious is mostly full of? Painful, traumatic memories of the past and by protecting you from those toxic familiar patterns it also manifests them.
It’s like one huge ironic loop, for example, you fear to be lonely and rejected so you prevent yourself from getting too close and when someone offers you, true love, you don’t accept it. The end result is you still alone and feeling rejected.
In order for your ego to protect you, it needs to keep you in that painful experience and make that a vital part of your identity.
Mindfulness gives you the power of being self-aware and choosing what makes the choices. Take back control and start with meditating on how you make your choices and why.
REMOVE YOURSELF FROM TOXIC PEOPLE
You lay down with dogs you will get up with fleas. I have thousands of stories that will back this up.
I used to have many people in my inner circle and realized a majority of the reason I kept them there is because they have been there for so long. I used times as an excuse to settle in my friendships and relationships and it did not pan out well.
The content of the conversation was outdated, the bars, clubs, and alcohol were no longer distracting me from the truth and change needed to be made. I took the time to explain the changes I was experiencing and why I needed to break up with certain friends. Some took it well and some did not but it was my truth either way.
When you’ve had enough pain in your life you will find an inner strength unlike any other. You will be willing to do what’s necessary to bring joy back to your life.
List the external things that you need to do every single day. That could be a glass of wine, phoning a specific friend, ruminating on a past experience or smoking a blunt. Once you’ve got this list written spend time thinking on each and list three reasons for why you do each.
As a personal example, I used to smoke weed every single day at least three times a day. I faced myself and noticed I smoke weed in order to not think about certain topics, run away from specific realities or deny truths. Obviously, that needed to be cut out and here we are 🙂
CUT HIM OR HER OUT…NOW
This will resonate with a few people but if there is someone, you know who, that deep down you know brings heartache they need to go. If you want to change you need to eventually accept it will require you to step out of that comfort zone and make those changes.
It took me awhile and I don’t judge when it comes to matters of the heart because I know what it feels like to be “bound” to someone toxic. However, as hard as it may be if it’s painful now it won’t magically get better.
It takes two people to create a toxic relationship, leaving it in order to find what your part is in this toxicity is going to make all the difference if your hoping for reconciliation. Focus on yourself and once you remove all of the heaviness you will be able to move into a loving relationship with a light heart.
ACCEPT THAT YOU WILL MAKE MISTAKES
Don’t bother putting yourself down when you “slip up” just get back up and keep moving forward. You are trying to change your lifestyle and that isn’t easy considering how many years you’ve lived in this said lifestyle.
“Take your time and take notes.” — Jasmin O.
Not everyone will understand what you’re doing and there will be times you regret making the decision to change when everything gets uprooted. Reground yourself and when you need to relax please do so, don’t stress your heart or mind out any more than it already has been. I say that because if you’re reading this article then I’m sure you’ve been through some heart wrecking battle recently or maybe your trying to find the strength to have hope that the color will return to your life. I’m here to promise you that it will if you start believing, the transformation isn’t some bright white light that shines upon you on a random weekday and nothing is the same again.
It can be dark, confusing and intensely painful but remember your healing process isn’t the same as anyone else and whatever happens during this journey you were made to overcome.
Be True To You- Jasmin